Blackburn may have clawed their way out of the relegation spots for now, but, like a key witness in a mafia trial, I just don’t see them surviving. I do like Steve Kean and a lot of his players though. I think Samba – who may or may not be ill and may or may not be off to Paris St German – and Yakubu are two of the best in their positions in the entire league. Granted, it would have been better if the Yak hadn’t attempted to fill in for Samba’s absence on Saturday by putting in a tackle. Blackburn did well enough after his red card to get the win against Fulham, but his suspension will hurt them. At times this season, Blackburn’s luck has been so bad that it probably wouldn’t surprise anybody if it turned out Venkys had a special day in the week where each other their employees had to smash a mirror with a black cat under a ladder. Bad luck aside, I just don’t think they have what it takes to stay up despite recent good results.
Wigan were lucky to survive last season and find themselves in a familiar place in the table once again. Their two star men, Moses and Rodallega, have been underperforming and scoring less than an inbetweener with psoriasis. They are both young, which might be part of the problem, and Martinez has yet to find the solution. He needs to do that quickly as Wigan currently have the worst goal scoring record in the league and no amount of Al-Habsi heroics will sort that.
Bolton are in trouble I think. Owen Coyle is a good manager but they don’t have much depth, certainly not enough to adequately adjust to Stuart Holden’s continuing absence through injury. They also have the worst defensive record in the league, having let 46 goals past them. With Cahill gone their defensive woes will surely increase. I don’t think it will be long before Bolton only has Peter Kay to be proud of. [At least that will give him new material 20 years from now. “DO YOU REMEMBER WHEN…Bolton were in the Premier League? Ed.]
QPR started well this season but have recently hit a rough patch. They’ve brought in an excellent manager in Mark Hughes to act as their Viagra and with plans to spend big in this transfer window I think they could easily be staying up. This means I am predicting all three teams promoted this season will stay up… which may come back to bite me. A relegation for QPR will come back to bite Hughes more, given that he left their West London neighbours, Fulham, because he wanted to find a club that “matched his own ambitions”. Hughes’ first match in charge ended in a good performance…but a 1-0 defeat to Newcastle. Despite that, expect a good transfer window to boost the Rs.
Norwich are probably a surprise inclusion to anybody reading this. The only reason I have chosen to include them is simply because they are newcomers to the big boy league. They’re now 11 points clear of the relegation zone and, I think, will definitely stay up. There are far worse teams currently in the league than Norwich. Paul Lambert has done an incredible job so far and I’m sure it will continue. Any manager who can make Grant Holt appear mobile enough to play in the Premier League deserves to stay up.
Swansea, like Norwich, I have only really included because of their recent promotion. They are my personal favorite of the new kids on the block. Swansea have a pretty decent defensive record, mostly thanks to their keeper Michel Vorm, a man who keeps balls out his net like an Edinburgh bouncer keeps Derek Riordan out of nightclubs. If he can keep that up then I see them sticking around this season, because with not many options up front they rely on a solid performance at the back.
Wolves have been underachieving this season but have hit a pretty decent run of form. Holding Harry Redknapp’s talent-laden Tottenham globetrotters to a draw is no mean feat at the moment. Despite their still precarious position I don’t see Wolves being relegated. They have quality players and I expect them to turn things around – so long as they can hold onto the likes of Steven Fletcher. How many strikers will get you so many goals at Premier League level without the worry of them injuring themselves on international duty? The fans have eased up on Mick McCarthy as well, which will help the mentality of the club. Out of all the clubs I have listed I am most confident about Wolves staying up.
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About the Author
Edinburgh comic Gareth Waugh started comedy in 2010 and has clocked in a remarkable amount of gigs since then performing all over the country.
A man clearly addicted to disappointment Gareth supports Celtic and Arsenal which has made him a very depressed man so far this season with both teams floundering early on.
“Excellent” – Scotsman
“A particular highlight” – Edinburgh Evening News
“Well worth witnessing” – One4review
Follow Gareth on Twitter: @GarethWaugh
