The time is almost upon us where football fans across the nation burn this season’s official replica kit in a cleansing fire.
For those who have had an exciting and successful season, the fire is a way of offering sacrifice to the gods of football who may next season bless you with a run in the Europa League. For the rest of us, the fire is a way of sending toxic plumes of smoke up to the football gods as a curse.
That means you’ll be on the lookout for new ‘kit’, ‘clobber’ and ‘stuff’ to satiate your lust for sporting goods. Luckily, Scottish Comedy FC are going to bring you the top 5 (not necessarily nicest) kits launched and leaked every week until the start of next season! Aren’t you lucky?
5. Peru
Peru usually have stunningly simple, stunningly beautiful shirts but no-one at the Scottish Comedy FC Skull Fortress quite knows what to make of their new away kit for the Copa America. A slight departure from the usual thick sash running from shoulder to waist, this one doesn’t quite make it. What do you think?
4. Rotherham
The Millers’ new away kit is sponsored by Balreed which is good because you’re getting a pretty good Ball Read on Frazer Richardson in this photo! Ahahahahahahahahaha.
Sorry.
3. Watford
Premier League new boys Watford have had their fair share of disgusting kits in their time and while this effort manages not to inject pointless bits of red into the design, it’s not exactly easy on the eye.
It might scare the Hornets’ opposition into submission on the pitch but its design like a broken venetian blind probably won’t make it a must buy for fans.
2. Inter
Simple. Classic. Pirelli. Wooft.
1. Wolfsburg
And finally a wee nod to Wolfsburg who will take to the field for the DFB Pokal final against Borussia Dortmund wearing their new home shirt, emblazoned with this tribute to Junior Malanda who was killed in a car accident in January.
Our new watford shirt is just fine, its a style issue I guess but as you say you are from kilmarnock – but at least we dont play in the normal red blue or white. I have told commercial dept not to bother you boys. For info look at a hornet then our shirt – see, its clever innit?