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By Teddy (@ComedyTeddy)

When I heard Rangers were in talks with Ian Black, my jaw dropped. The guy who put Jelavic out for three months, the one topping the foul play charts, the figure who could actually unite Old Firm fans purely through the strength of their dislike of him.

Am I happy with how he’s performed so far in a Rangers jersey? No.

So that must be because he’s running around kicking people, right?

Wrong.

When Ian Black arrived at Rangers I realised he deserved the same support as any other player arriving at the club. Previously unpopular players have been signed before by Rangers. Gordan Petric and Ian Ferguson had been involved in a spat (well, it was Ferguson who spat…having taken an arm in the face from Petric in the first instance) before the Serbian signed for Rangers. Neil McCann’s perceived tendency to go to ground easily while at Hearts had also made him persona non grata before a match and title-winning display at Celtic Park sealed his place in the affections of the Rangers support.

In familiar pose with Caley Thistle.
Hence, slightly disgruntled but assuming I’d get over it, I watched Ian Black begin his Rangers career. Within a couple of games, he’d changed my perception of him. His performances in a Hearts jersey meant I’d had him down as some kind of Tasmanian devil figure, doing little more than scurrying around the pitch nailing people. In fact, given more time to watch him, I could see a player with a good first touch, eager to take the ball down and make sure he found one of his own players. Someone who seemed to want to slow the play down rather than play frenetically. As well as that, he became the side’s corner-kick taker, another aspect to his play that I hadn’t previously been aware of.

So, for a few matches, I was pleasantly surprised. Of course, the test was in waiting to see when this mask would slip and he’d launch into his first mistimed and misjudged tackle. I’m still waiting.

Initially, it seemed like he’d be the perfect signing to to sell more of those ‘Black & Red’ Rangers scarves…
In fact, he’s been more kicked than kicking. The opening matches of Rangers’ season seem to have acted like some kind of concentrated karma for him. We’re only about a quarter of a way through the season and already he must have repaid the cosmic debt of an entire career, having been booted up and down the park by 3rd division players and yet to see anyone face real punishment for it.

Rangers players were left feeling the pain of the defeat to Stirling Albion, but Black was left feeling it more than most, thanks to being the victim of a chest-high studding from one of the Binos’ players.

http://www.101greatgoals.com/blog/gif-ian-blacks-kung-fu-assault-rangers-v-stirling-albion/

Against Queens Park at Ibrox he managed to take a boot to the face.

If the universe is seeking to repay Black for his past sins, it’s hard to shake the view that referees are also shrugging and taking a “what goes around comes around” view to the challenges on him. The difference being that when Black was dishing those challenges out, he was being punished for them.

So how is he reacting? This is the thing. He isn’t.

McCulloch powering home an Ian Black corner against Falkirk in the Challenge Cup. Black’s impressive set pieces are an aspect of his game that his previous reputation had overshadowed.
Last night against Caley Thistle (credit to ICT for a deserved victory by the way, don’t want this article to seem like last night’s result was only down to how Rangers played), when penalised for a slight tug on the arm of a player he picked up the ball pleadingly for a moment before handing it over to the ref. Patronisingly, the ref then felt the need to take him aside and talk to him, apparently about the manner in which he handed him the ball. This kind of “It’s Ian Black, I’d better behave in an over-officious manner so that I can claim to be managing his on-field conduct” approach must drive Black nuts, but still he doesn’t react.

You can see Black consciously controlling himself in every aspect of his time on the field for Rangers. You can see him put his foot on the ball to slow the play. You can see him stay on the ground until he’s calmed down to avoid confronting a player who’s just wiped him out. You can see him count to ten between scooping the ball up and handing it to the ref when he’s been penalised for a nothing challenge.

And this is where Black may feel like he can’t win.

Because I watch him do all of this and I find myself thinking…actually, just kick somebody.

So much effort is going into him controlling and pacing his actions that his demeanour is that of somebody permanently seething their way around the pitch. There’s no release for it. All that nervous energy is being pent up and it’s not actually doing Rangers much good. The benefit of Rangers still having a fairly high quality squad is that they should be able to play at a higher tempo than other sides. Rangers best performance of the season? Against Motherwell. High tempo, all action. Black? He wasn’t playing.

Rangers players celebrate scoring against Motherwell, their best performance of the season against a side then sitting 2nd in the SPL.
His commitment to managing his demons and his reputation is admirable, but it’s hard to shake the belief that he might start playing in a more natural and relaxed way if he treated himself to nailing somebody inside the first five minutes and taking a yellow for it.

‘Nailing somebody’ is an extreme description. What we’re not seeing is him crunching into 50/50s or driving the play on. Rangers are having enough trouble playing against the opposition this season without one of their midfielders seeming to be playing against his own reputation.

Somewhere in Ian Black’s play there’s a balance. Hopefully he can find it. Because if he can add SOME (nobody wants to see that red card come out) of his old edge to this player who likes to get the ball down, pick a pass, and to take responsibility for set pieces…then he can still prove to be a great signing.

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About the Author

Twice runner-up in Scottish Comedian of the Year finals, Teddy was named ‘Best Up and Coming Comedian’ at the Scottish Variety Awards in 2010. He’s written for two BBC Radio 5 ‘Unsporting Reviews of the Year’, and has also worked as both writer and script editor on the BBC1 Scotland football shows ‘Offside’ & ‘Only An Excuse?’. He’s been a Rangers season-ticket holder for the past 17 years, but he’s all about the football not “all that other shite”. Also has a fondness for Dynamo Kyiv that can be traced back to an unhealthy obsession with Alexei Mikhailitchenko (or Oleksiy Mykhalychenko if you prefer to transliterate from the Ukrainian rather than the Russian. That’s the unhealthy obsession we’re talking about.)

“brilliant Scottish comic” Kate Copstick, Scotland on Sunday

“Head, shoulders, knees and toes above the rest…mighty stage presence and impressively high punchline ratio” Brian Donaldson, Scotsman

“freshly minted topical gags…pin-sharp lines…great routine…a class act” Steve Bennett, Chortle.co.uk

“has flourished…cracking lines” Jay Richardson, Scotsman

Ian Black – more kicked than kicking

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One thought on “Ian Black – more kicked than kicking

  • November 1, 2012 at 12:38 pm
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    What a lot of rubbish. He remains the player he has always been, nasty, snarling at everyone. Did you not see the incident 1 minute from half time where he threw the ball at the linesman for giving a decision against him, for which he should have been booked. His eventual booking, the 5th of the season , should have seen him sent off.

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