Since Michael’s piece on fixing the atmosphere in Scottish football grounds sparked a lot of debate on Twitter about how best to get the excitement back into stadiums, we asked our writers what they think clubs should be doing.
The results are varied, weird, sometimes wonderful and mostly incredibly expensive but here’s the Scottish Comedy FC writers’ guide to fixing Scottish football…
Here’s a puzzler for you. What Scottish team has never played Rangers at Ibrox? Now, before you all jump on the SevCo/NewCo arguments let’s assume that we’re talking about Rangers the football club and nothing else.
Have you got it? Here’s a clue. Who is the only club to have not played Rangers in the league? It can’t be a championship club. Nor can it be a league one or league two clubs as they’ve all played Rangers in the last three years. So, it must a Premiership side – but which one?
I’ll leave you to ponder that as I now ask you to think how exciting it will be when Rangers finally plays this club at Ibrox. A new team. New players. New songs. It’ll be fantastic. And that’s the problem with Scottish football right there. We don’t have any surprises any more. We play the same teams every three months – or, sooner in the case of Celtic and Dundee United who played each other four times in a month. Familiarity breed contempt.
We need a bigger top league. We need two games a season home and away. We need a change because Ross Country (they were promoted to the Premiership the year Rangers went down) can’t be the only club left in football to experience something new.
I realise that this is probably unlikely due to the budgetary restrictions at many clubs, but knocking down and rebuilding a number of grounds capacities which are appropriate to the club is the best approach.
The old SPL rule which stated that clubs needed to have a capacity of 10,000 or more to play in the top flight was crazy and seemingly based on the movie Field Of Dreams and its ‘build it and they will come’ ethos. Not only does the sheer size of these stadia impact the atmosphere but the clubs wasted a load of cash building them.
A vital part of the live football experience is the atmosphere, and you just don’t get it in so many of today’s grounds. Case in point, Pollok Juniors regularly have small crowds but a great atmosphere because of their smaller ground.
Football atmosphere is a reflection of how exciting a game is. A game is more exciting when it involves:
a) Goals
b) Good weather
c) Alchohol
I can make Scottish football better at all three of these. Bring back the The Tennents Sixes. This was an annual indoor 6-a-side football tournament.
It had goals! 6 a-side games on a small pitch guarantees goals. It had good weather… it was indoors. It had alcohol! It was sponsored by Scotland’s favourite alphabetical letter.
But most importantly no one team dominated the event. Aberdeen, Heart of Midlothian and Rangers all won the tournament twice each. The final team to win it was Partick Thistle. They still have the trophy displayed in the Firhill trophy cabinet.
So let’s convert our game from 11-a-side outdoors to 6-a-side indoors. If its good enough for the fans (most of us play fives) then it’s good enough for the pros.
A busier stadium will always have a better atmosphere than one that’s half-empty (or less), so clubs need to do more to get people through the door. Many already do offers of free or reduced tickets to schools but these should be pushed more.
In the music world, artists have had to find different business models to cope with the digital impact. Some now add products of tangible value alongside the music – e.g. t-shirts etc. Perhaps create bundled packages of tickets with new shirts? Or have match tickets featuring collectable player portraits by a local artist?
It’s all about getting people through the turnstiles in the first place.
I can’t help but agree with Teddy on this one. 5,000 people were at the Falkirk vs. Hibs game last night and the tickets were £18 each for an adult.
I’m not sure cutting the price in half ensures double the attendance, but every time I’m at Easter Road I can’t help think filling the stadium at £5 a ticket would make sense. Now Hibs have taken control of the catering as well, I’m sure the profit margins on a £3 paper cup of cola are significant that if 10,000 people are buying one at half time, that would allow for a shortfall in tickets.
Not only that, full stadiums would surely be a help in attracting players.
I’d say slash the ticket prices, allow a family of 4 to enjoy a day out without deciding if it’s the football or the gas bill. It should help bring along the next generation of supporters as well.
We want to hear from you! What would you do to bring the atmosphere back to Scottish football? Are there any clubs which are getting it right or are there any doing it spectacularly wrong? Leave us a comment, drop us an email, tweet or facebook us and let us know!
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He is the editor of this fine site and a regular on the Scottish Comedy FC Podcast despite refusing to go anywhere near Owen's house.
He supports Kilmarnock and is a comedian to no-one but himself.
