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Dundee Harp had a player, Tom O’Kane. who was an Irishman who lived in Arbroath. After the game he sent a telegram home to wind up his friends and boast of his achievement. But, unknown to Tom, that very afternoon, Arbroath had gone one better. At a rain-lashed Gayfield the rampant home team handed out a 36-0 thrashing to Bon Accord.
To make matters worse, Dundee Harp had actually scored more than 35 goals. The referee had noted at least 37 but as he was unsure of the exact total he discussed it with O’Kane and they agreed that the ref would tell the football league that the score was 35 – 0. Not knowing the tally was so important O’Kane was happy to take the lower figure, until he heard back from Arbroath.
At first he thought their response was a joke, that they couldn’t possibly have scored one more goal at the exact same time as Dundee Harp was creating a new record, It was only when Tom arrived back in Arbroath that he realised the truth – Arbroath had set a new record for the highest winning margin in football, a record that still stands to this day.
Even if Harp’s original 37-0 scoreline had been allowed to stand, there is evidence to suggest that Arbroath may still have beaten it. Many years later, the referee of the Bon Accord game, Dave Stormont, admitted in a newspaper article that he had disallowed seven legitimate Arbroath goals. He said:
“While they may have looked doubtful from an offside point of view, so quickly did [Arbroath] carry the ball from midfield, and so close and rapid was their passing, that it was very doubtful whether they could be offside. That would have made the score 43-0.”
If it’s any consolation to Tom, the Dundee Harp game is still officially the second highest winning margin.
Freak results are not uncommon at Arbroath, though records are few and far between since 1885. They play their matches at Gayfield Park, which was built next to the sea and is exposed to the shifting and strong north sea cold and winds. This creates problems for visiting teams as the ball can be caught in the strong winds, bamboozling both attacking players and goalies coming for crosses.
For such a cold town it is ironic that it was the home of Scottish singer and entertainer Andy Stewart, who lived and died in Arbroath. In 1961 Andy had a hit around the world with song ‘Donald Where’s Your Troosers?’ about a Scotsman wearing a kilt. If he’d been singing it in Arbroath he’d have sung ‘Donald Where’s Your Longjohns?’
Like fans of English counterparts Grimbsy Town, the crowd like to chant “We Only Sing When We’re Fishing”:
“We only sing when we’re fishing!
we only sing when we’re fiiiiiiiishing!
we only sing when we’re fishing!
sing when we’re fishing!”
And whenever a goal is scored at Gayfield the stadium tannoy plays ‘Tom Hark’ by The Piranhas.
The song was originally recorded in 1953 by a group called Elias And His Zig Zag Jive Flutes and is based on “Kwela”, the traditional South African folk music.
The Piranhas’ saxophonist Phil Collis discovered the song in his mum’s record collection and persuaded the band to do a version. Bob wrote the lyrics as the group travelled in the back of a van from their hometown of Brighton to a recording studio in London.
“The original was an instrumental so we brought it up to date with some lyrics,” says Bob. “I could say the words were deep and meaningful, but they don’t really mean much. I scribbled them on an envelope in about an hour.”
The song itself is 2 minutes 45 seconds long. If the club had played it after each of their 35 goals in 1855 it would have lasted longer than the game itself.
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About the Author
After too many years as season ticket holder at Parkhead, Andy Todd renounced the SPL three years ago to support Queens Park. One team is a rank bunch of amateurs who play in a state of the art stadium and the other is…(I think we can all see where this is going).
Andy has been performing comedy for 18 months but is currently ‘between gigs’ while he writes a book on Scottish property law to be published in Summer 2012. Its potential audience will be less than 300 but his mum will be very proud.
Follow Andy on Twitter: @toddandy
Check out Andy’s website: www.toddandy.com
