In the first of his weekly news round-ups, Teddy takes aim at everything from Chelsea to Scott Brown…
Hibernian reiterated their position that they won’t conduct any business that will help to strengthen Rangers. A stance that leaves them sharing common ground with most Rangers boards for the last 4 years.
Hibs continued their bad start to the season by losing 2-1 to the Sons of the Rock. Granted, the way they defend, they’d probably ship goals to the daughter of Hulk Hogan too.
Over at Scott Allan-less Rangers, Nicky Law was telling the media that the club’s failure in last season’s play-off final was a blessing in disguise. While Stuart McCall was at home putting his foot through Sky Sports News.
Moving into the top flight and Rodney Sneijder had no sooner arrived in Dundee than he was having to visit the local hospital to have tests on a possible viral infection. Dundee, City of Discovery. So long as that discovery is discharge.
John Collins announced that Celtic couldn’t be challenged for the league title in Scotland because their opponents don’t have players who can match their cleverness and speed of thought. Which would already be insulting enough if the Parkhead side didn’t have Scott Brown on their books.
Qarabag players complained in midweek that Scott Brown had mocked them by laughing at their passing. Still, that’s a laugh they’ll be able to return if Broony ever appears on Celebrity Mastermind.
Where it does show that Celtic are short on speed of thought is in their PR dept, who haven’t yet thought to take John Collins’s phone, block his internet access and gag him at all times when he’s outside of the dugout.
In England, Jose Mourinho took his deflection tactics to a new level by blaming the Chelsea club doctor, Eva Carneiro for entering the pitch to treat Eden Hazard. It’s not often that you find yourself comparing Mourinho with Jimmy Hill but this did have more than a whiff of ‘the Chin’ blaming a ball boy for giving the ball back too quickly. A situation that Eden Hazard is yet to encounter at Chelsea.
Joey Barton looks set to sign for West Ham, a club whose chairman, David Gold, has spoken out about Barton in the past. Gold has previously taken to Twitter to refer to him as “vile” and to suggest he has “a problem”. The plus side of how David Gold made his fortune is that at least you’ll never see him on Twitter using the term “w*nk*r” as an insult.
